The roles that I play in my family are sister, daughter, niece, cousin, and granddaughter. I am the oldest of four children. I am the second oldest granddaughter on both sides of the family. I am one of many nieces and hardly any nephews.

My role as a sister is to help with homework, put up with conflicts and help resolve them, care for them when needed, and pick them up after school. My role as a daughter is to be caring and kind to my siblings, do things when asked, set a good example, and fill in for my parents. Being a niece means I have to be kind, caring, respectful and understanding of my aunts and uncles and how they run their families. As a cousin I have to be willing to do things I extremely dislike doing.  I will be put in the situations where I have to endure extreme craziness and loudness for hours (something I really dislike). It can get so loud it feels like you are at a football game and you are sitting right next to the band. That is what a niece and a cousin is like; a headache. As a granddaughter in my family you become accustom to being jealous. My grandparents go to Hawaii and Sun Valley at least two to five times a year to both places. They never take any grandchildren or their own children. The worst part is that they take their bunny Sassy. Sometimes I cannot believe that I am jealous of a bunny! I have to endure how great their trip is and endless texts with pictures of the great time I am not having or the sites I’m not seeing. I have to be like a daughter to my grandparents and be grateful.

My rites are few. My rite as a sister is make decisions in my siblings’ behalf when my parents aren’t there. We call this the “OAH” (the oldest available Hart). My rite as a daughter is to voice my thoughts and opinions. I also have the right to live at home and use the car as long as I’m responsible. I also have the rite to have medical care (at least my parents say so). I don’t feel I have rights as a niece. As a cousin I have the rite to give my opinion. Finally, as a granddaughter I have the rite to be loved no matter what I do.

A longtime family friend, Pete, has become part of our family. He is great friends with my dad. They are so much a like that they are like brothers. They joke that they are, “Brothers from another mother.” We lived many years as neighbors. My only obligation is to have a good time with him. No rites included.

This is what kinship is like for me in my family.